Sexually transmitted Infections (STIs)

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Gonorrhoea.
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The clap.
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The chlam.
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Chlamydia.
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Crabs.
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Crotch crickets.
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Herpes or cold sores.
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The gift that keeps on giving.
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(MID-TEMPO ELECTRONIC MUSIC)
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Captions by Able.
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When I first learnt about sex,
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they showed me this picture of an STI and were like,
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'This is what will happen to you if you ever have sex.'
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I thought that if I had sex, I would automatically get an STI,
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and then my mum would have to take me to the doctor.
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Then everyone would know that I not only had sex
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but that I've also got an STI.
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So, as a teenager, I think I was quite sheltered.
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Like, I went to an all-boys Catholic high school.
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Sex was never really brought up,
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apart from, like, year 13, where we did sex ed,
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and we got taught about STIs
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and we got taught about chlamydia.
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And chlamydia, as it turns out, is an STI;
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- it's not a type of flower, as I... - (LAUGHTER)
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...grew up thinking it was.
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STIs are a common part of sexual activity,
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and it's nothing to be ashamed about.
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You can't tell just by lookin' at someone if they have an STI.
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I shit you not. Like, my dad used to grow flowers,
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and you had your, like, begonias, your tulips, your camellias,
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- your chlamydias. - (LAUGHTER)
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Like, my mate came round to my house one day, and he's like,
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'Oh, bro, just gave my girlfriend some chlamydia,' and I thought,
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'Oh, that's romantic.' But, nah, it's not.
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- (LAUGHTER) - It's the opposite.
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There are lots of STIs, from chlamydia to HIV.
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Some of the more common ones include things like gonorrhoea,
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HPV and herpes.
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Chlamydia is the most common STI in New Zealand,
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and if it's not treated, it can cause infertility.
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You can get it from unprotected sexual contact,
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including vaginal, anal and oral sex.
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Gonorrhoea's a bacterial infection,
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and if left untreated, it can cause infertility.
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You can get gonorrhoea from unprotected sex.
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The human papilloma virus, or HPV, has no symptoms,
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but it can be a nasty infection, because it can cause cancer.
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But luckily, there's a vaccine that can help protect you.
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I get a lot of questions about herpes.
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People wanna know how they can get it
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if they didn't sleep with someone with herpes,
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and the answer is that not everyone knows that they've got it.
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People also wanna know if they can get it on their genitals
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if they have sex or oral sex
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with someone with cold sores on their mouth,
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and the answer to that is yes.
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It's the same virus.
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One of the viruses likes living round the mouth,
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and one likes living round the genitals,
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but they can live in both places.
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But if you just kiss someone with a cold sore,
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you'll give them a cold sore on their mouth,
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not on their genitals.
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But if you give someone oral sex with a cold sore,
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you could give them genital herpes.
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Which is why it's really important to tell your partner
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if you have an STI.
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Always use condoms and dental dams,
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particularly if you are HIV-positive.
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For more information about AIDS and HIV,
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you can visit the AIDS Foundation website.
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So, what if you don't know if you have STI?
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If you have any symptoms -
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like discharge from your penis or vagina,
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bleeding between periods,
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lower abdominal pain,
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pain when peeing,
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pain during sex or pain in your testicles,
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go and get checked by a doctor or at a Family Planning clinic.
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Best thing to do is to get checked often.
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See, I keep a note in my phone. So pay phone bill; get STI check;
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schedule FaceTime with mum. Hmm.
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Some STIs don't have any symptoms,
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and so if you have unprotected sex or you change your partner,
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make sure you get tested.
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There's another group of infections
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that aren't technically classified as STIs
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but can still be uncomfortable.
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First, there's the urinary tract infection, or UTI.
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Otherwise known as, 'It burns! It burns.'
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And, 'Why do I have to pee for the 40,000th time?'
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The most common way to get a UTI is when
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bacteria from around your anus...
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WHISPERS: Or bum.
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...gets into your urethra...
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WHISPERS: Your pee hole.
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...and causes an infection. This can happen after having sex.
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People with vaginas are more at risk of a UTI,
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and one way to prevent that is to pee before and after sex.
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If you have a UTI, you'll need to see a doctor or nurse.
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And trust me - you'll want to.
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Honestly, it's not scary going to see a doctor or a nurse.
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It's like seeing an old friend -
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except they ask what kinda sex you're having,
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which, to be honest, is kinda what my old friends do anyway.
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There's also pubic lice, which is basically like nits for your pubes.
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It's... pube lice.
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Other infections can include bacterial vaginosis and thrush,
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and symptoms of thrush can include...
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...and you might even get itchiness.
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But the thing is - both people with penises or vaginas can get it.
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If you're seeing these symptoms for the first time, go and see a doctor,
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but if you've had these symptoms before and you get them again,
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you can buy thrush medication at the pharmacy without a prescription.
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Bacterial vaginosis is caused when
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the normal balance of bacteria in your vagina is upset.
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This can be more likely to happen
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if you've got a new sex partner or you've started having sex more.
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Symptoms that you might notice would be
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a funny, smelly discharge that might be kinda grey in colour,
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and if you have these symptoms,
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you'll need to see a doctor or nurse.
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The doctor or nurse might ask you questions like -
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when were you last checked?
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Do you have any symptoms? Have you changed your partner recently?
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Do you use protection? And what kind of sex do you have?
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One thing that can make you more likely to get BV or thrush
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is by washing your vagina with anything other than water.
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Ooh!
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So don't squirt anything up there, even if it's soapy.
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Especially if it's soapy.
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When you go to the doctor, you should tell them everything.
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They've heard literally everything.
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I tell my doctors some stuff they don't wanna hear.
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I told my last doctor
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that I ran over my cat.
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I was so nervous the first time I got a check,
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but it's not that hard. Sometimes you just have to pee into a cup,
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which I accept as a personal challenge of my aim.
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Sometimes you have to get a swab, but that's pretty sweet,
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and often you can do it yourself,
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or you can get them to do it for you.
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Sometimes it's not a swab; it's just a blood test,
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or they just have a feel around.
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Honestly, it's just like getting your hard drive checked for viruses.
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If there was anything I could tell my younger self,
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it would be to never be embarrassed about
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a doctor lookin' at your bits, because it's literally their job.
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Sometimes when I run into my doctor in the street, I think,
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'Hang on. You've held my testicles in your hands before,'
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but that's just cos I think my testicles are special.
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I'm probably just any old pair of testicles to them.
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The good thing is - if you get checked regularly,
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you can pick up on any issues early and you can treat them.
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You can take a pill.
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Or use a cream.
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Just shave off all your pubes.
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That one is just for crabs.
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Most STIs are very easily treated, mostly just with antibiotics.
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Some STIs, though, can be treated but not cured.
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Oh, yeah - herpes.
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That won't go away, but it's pretty chill to deal with.
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Look, best-case scenario is that you don't end up with an STI,
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so make sure you stay safe.
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Condoms or oral or dental dams
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are your best bet for safeguarding you against STIs.
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Remember, the best way to protect yourselves from an infection
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is to use protection.
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SOFTLY: Did I just rhyme 'infection' and 'protection'?
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No glove, no love.
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That's the rule of thumb.